This is basically the only way I’m getting old.



Friday Four

1. There are more smore Krispy treats. Yum.

2. My friend P has a going away party this weekend. I’ve known him since he was a camper at our freshman camp! I feel so old!


It’s perfection. Check http://www.marleylilly.com if you want one!

4. I’m loving all these Kate Spade quotes that have been popping up everywhere. This one is one of the best ones::


Cake Pop?


Sometimes I get the overwhelming urge to bake. My lunch hour and cake pop maker allow that to happen.


As if I needed more shoes…

So I may or may not have bought two more pairs of shoes yesterday. It should come as no surprise that I did not have enough willpower to resist BOGO at Payless (it’s one of my better qualities – you’re welcome Retail Outlets across the world).  And I’m not even planning on getting rid of any shoes to make room for these. =)


What is sad is that I can’t wear more than a 2″ or 3″ inch heel anymore. My old lady knees get me every time. And with heels on, I’m still not average height.


(Yes they are kid shoes. Judge away but they’re cheaper and I like them!)


(This pair is for a wedding where I had to wear all black .)




Biggest Mini Burrito

Office lunch at Chuy’s. Lots of food for the price… But even the mini burrito is bigger than my hand!


My London Bridge want to go down.

Let me preface this by saying: I’m totally team Emily. I think she’s awesome and totally deserves love (as much as you can think someone you’ve never met deserves love). However, some of the things that happen make me shake my head.

According to the Previews, this was going to be the most dramatic episode in Bachelor History. Sweet lil Emily even tells someone to get the f*** out over daughter. Which is understandable, you’re on reality TV with your daughter. 

They are in London this week! One of the boys even claims it’s the most romantic city – sorry Paris! 

The first one-on-one goes to Sean. (He’s the D1 football player from Texas). Emily apparently lived a past life in London because she is leading this boy around like she’s the Queen herself. Then, Sean got on “Speaker’s Corner.” He winged it… and said love about 25 times in 2 minutes. Make that 50 times. I am questioning his actual ability to love. It’s just all too much Sean, you’re trying awful hard. Dinner in the London Tower? Because love takes no prisoners? What’s next Alcatraz? Eastern State Premonitory? Also Emily threatened to behead Sean if he didn’t behave – going very King Henry the 8th on people. 

Meanwhile, the boys are whiny about group dates. Kalon opens his helicopter affording mouth to make a jab at Ricky (Emily’s daughter) and how if you end up with Emily every day will be a group date. As my daddy would say, “Smooth move exlax.”  They get another date card that quotes Shakespeare. “I think that’s Shakespeare.” High school english teachers around the world just cringed.

Also, can we just take a moment to discuss Kalon (as he is perceived on this show – I will totally admit we could be besties in real life or something). 

1. He showed up in a helicopter, came out being all smooth and douche canoe like. (Thank you The Bloggess for that one. Check http://www.thebloggess.com for lots of laughs. You’re welcome.)

2. He’s totally one of those people who would never hold the door or pick something up for you if you dropped it aka no chivalry. Which makes me judge you. 

3. I don’t know if he hates kids or just Emily’s child in particular… But people should lock him in a daycare just for funsies. 

4. Kalon needs a filter. And potentially manners. And his Momma should/probably is embarrassed. 

So group dating it up with Romeo and Juliet. Arie gets to be a nurse – haha. This is hysterical with his accent (correction: all their accents). Picture Rhett Butler (from Gone with the Wind) talking and Leonardo DiCaprio acting… That’s pretty much what this is starting to shape up as. Also Kalon thinks he will up for a Tony after this performance – he has his game face on.  I would like to throw tomatoes.. Well if I didn’t like my TV. Um. Is Emily dressed as Juliet or Colonial Williamsburg? How did they find a dress that fit Arie? These boys are now going to fight like salmon going upstream to get that special time with Emily. Arie wants her to make him feel like he’s the only boy on the show. :cue Rihanna: Let’s discuss Ryan shall we? He told Emily that she would make a great trophy wife and that she better not gain any weight. Which he totally made up sucked up to her by buying her jewelry. 

The Kalon drama starts now. He’s not going to retract nor apologize for his statement about calling Ricki baggage. Apparently he means baggage as responsibility – which is a total CYA (cover your ass) move that you do when you don’t actually mean it. Doug tattles to Emily. Emily throws aside her Southern Lady tendencies to kick ass and take names. Emily goes to the group. Doug takes charge of the confrontation. Emily sees Emily as a blessing (as every parent should). Kalon tries to interrupt… like a jerk. Basically, I was expecting WWE Raw or something and Emily gave me a lot of “I’m disappointed” and “This is insulting.” I would like to see the Southern Sass that everyone knows us Southern Belles have. No group rose.

Also nice butt shots ABC. I’m sure the husbands/boyfriends/males being forced to watch appreciate it. 

Commercial: Quizno’s has fresh lobster? I’m not sure how I feel about that. Quizno’s is going to have a lobster tank and kill lobsters in front of people? Let’s leave that to Red Lobster, shall we? 

Also, is Glass House like a real life Sims game? That’s what it sounds like. I’m totally a fan.

Jef is getting a one-on-one apparently. I need him to not only add another f to his name but also a hair cut. I’m pretty sure the Fresh Prince of Bel Air called – they want their hair back. (Love Emily’s coat on this date!) They receive etiquette training during an afternoon tea. How awkward. It’s hard to be romantic and sexy when you are getting critiqued. Which in turn caused them to dine and dash. Jef gets the awesome task of making Emily feel super comfortable with the boys after the Kalon debacle. His solution to smoothing over the debacle is comparing Ricki to vintage Louis Vuitton or a Chloe handbag. Do what you do Jef – just remember she already had one fiance die in a plane crash – I don’t think her heart can handle unicorns and glitter as well. Afterwards, they have dessert on a ferris wheel in the middle of London where there is dessert which is apparently plastic because no one is eating it. They begin this conversation that is a healthy mix between Nicholas Sparks and the song “Check Yes or No”. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NHxS8wlDngI) Jef finally has his first kiss by asking permission (by letter to her father).  “Emily gives me the feeling people write fairy tales about.” Or any rom com to date. 

Emily proceeds to grill all of the boys about why they didn’t stand up for her and what they will do in the future. I akin this to spotlight in a police station. Ryan reenacts Romeo and Juliet (again) which Emily eats up. Does no one have a bad idea alarm here?!? Direct quote “It’s less butterflies in my stomach and more butterflies in my heart.” I can’t make this up if I tried. 

So, Kalon goes home on the group date. Jef, Sean, Dougie Fresh, Ryan, Chris, Wolf, Travis, and Arie received roses. 

The Mushroom Farmer goes home. He wasn’t expecting to go home… never mind that this group date was the first one he’d been on.

Join me after next Monday’s episode where they go to Croatia. Lots of kisses and someone is going home. More drama – someone is not here for Emily (surprise, surprise). 

Proof I can cook

Dinner was big shells, ground beef, sauce and cheese. Delish!! Plus some cheesy garlic bread that probably counteracted my entire workout today.


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